Monday, July 1, 2013

Tips for a Long Distance Relationship (Part 1)

For this two-part series, I'm having H (the boyfriend) come over and help me out and give you some tips on surviving a long distance relationship. H and I spend every summer (~2 months) about 800 miles apart. Here's how we do it:



Greetings fellow members of the interwebs, you can call me H. Not because I have anything to hide, I just like feeling mysterious. I like hunting, fishing, offroading, blowing things up/lighting things on fire, NASCAR, football, baseball, golf, the south, and my bitchin 95 ford bronco. That's not everything but it should give you a rough idea of who I am.

I've been dating Allie for a while now, and I think she's pretty cool. You should definitely follow her blog. If Bob Saget wasn't so tweaked out on coke all the time he would give it two thumbs up, so that just goes to show how awesome her blog is. Anyways, this is our second summer together. During the summer, I stay here in Dixie and hold down the fort while Allie goes up North. Long distance relationships are far from easy but they are possible. Here are some tips that help us get through the summer:
Look at the small picture. When I go on runs, I focus on a crack in the sidewalk about 20-30 feet away, run to it, pick another crack, run to it, etc.... If I look way ahead, I get discouraged and I get worn out faster. When I focus on something close to me and run to it, I find that I can run much farther and the run is much less miserable. This same idea can be applied to long distance relationships. Instead of getting overwhelmed by the idea of being away from your loved one for (enter time apart here), take things day by day. When you wake up in the morning, focus your mind on getting through that day. Don't look at the big picture, look at the small one.

 
Go out of your way to make your time apart as easy as possible on the other person. Make time for phone calls and skype dates. You don't have to set aside a whole hour for a phone call, even 15 minute phone calls are nice. When you can't talk on the phone or skype, text them. When you can't text, just send a little text saying something nice and letting them know what you're up to. One of me and Allies favorite methods of communication is letter writing! It may not be as popular as it once was but I love it. You can write about future date ideas, tell them stories that they haven't heard, tell them things you like about them, or write really anything that comes to mind. You can draw pictures too! I'm no artist but it adds a little personal touch.

 
Keep yourself busy. If you're broke like me, you may think that it's hard to keep busy when your wallet is as empty as a doughnut box in a police station. However, there are many things you can do to keep busy without having to spend much or anything. Things to do with a little money: Go see a band you've never heard of (cover charges at music venue near me are usually $7 for minors, $5 for adults). Go to a discount movie theater or get a redbox movie (there's a $2 movie theater near me, and redbox is only $1.20). Go to a minor league sporting event (the tickets for the minor league baseball team here are $14), There are many more things you can do on a budget, those are just the first three I could think of. Things to do for free: Go to a park, read, window shop, clean/organize (I know, not very fun but it still keeps you busy), run/walk/exercise, cook (Not free for everyone, but I still live at home so I don't buy groceries. If you have to buy your own groceries, you can still cook on a budget. And no, I don't mean ramen noodles). There's plenty of things to do for free. Just google free things to do in (enter city here), and I'm sure you'll find something. The less time you spend alone doing nothing the better.

 
Give your significant things for them to remember you by. Allie has some of my t-shirts, a sweatshirt, a bottle of my cologne, a bear I gave her for valentines day, and a photo album full of pictures of us. I have one of her t-shirts, some sweatshirts, one of her stuffed animals, and a bottle of her perfume. Sure it's not the most manly thing to sleep with a stuffed sheep covered in perfume, but it helps. Having some of hers stuff makes me feel closer to her, especially her perfume. Every little bit helps in a long distance relationship.


I hope these tips help!

Thanks for reading,

H


P.S. Tune back in next week to hear my tips on how I survive living without this stellar human being. --Allie

13 comments:

  1. These are good! My fiance's currently deployed in the Middle East and we do a lot of these..especially the keeping busy! That's always difficult for me.

    Laura

    P.S. Your boyfriend sounds great :)

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  2. Thanks Laura! We'd love to hear your tips. And he is! :)

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  3. […] ← Tips for a Long Distance Relationship (Part 1) […]

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  4. I love that you two still write letters. They're more meaningful and you can save them to look back at them years later.

    I'm not in a long distance relationship but I have been in the past and I agree - those quick little texts can put a smile on your face. They mean a lot and shows you're thinking about them enough to take a quick second to send a text. :)

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  5. Thanks Jasmine. I love getting letters from H and I know he feels the same! I keep them in a box and reread the old ones from when we first started dating sometimes. Thanks again for visiting and your kind words.

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  6. I'm definitely much more of a pessimist when it goes to long distance relationships because I'm on the 'I AM SO SICK OF THIS' end. But honestly the hardest thing for me isn't long distance, it's the getting reacquainted AFTER long distance. I got so used to my boyfriend not being around after eight months that we had a bit of a struggle suddenly being around each other 24/7 and had to learn how to give each other space!

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  7. Oh well eight months is much longer than H and I ever spend apart! I leave for the summer, for about two months and that's all I can handle! It is tough not to be pessimistic--I find that focusing on other things and distracting myself is the best way to deal with it a lot of the time. Thanks for stopping by and your honesty! xx

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  8. […] distance relationship. H and I spend every summer (~2 months) about 800 miles apart. You can read part one here. How do I live without this stellar human being? Read […]

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  9. This is really sweet! I've spent a lot of time in a long distance relationship, and although we're together for the most part now, we still have to spend summers apart as well. I think people tend to be really dismissive of long distance relationships, but that seems a bit silly to me. I don't think I would want to be with anyone who I wouldn't be willing to deal with that for! Seems like you guys do a lot of what we've done-- skype is an absolute lifesaver! Hope the summer is going quickly for you two :)

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  10. Thanks for your sweet words! And I've found the same thing! Even though we're only apart for two months, some people just don't understand how we do it. We've got 13 days left! (not that I'm counting) :)

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  11. omg! He's funny! I lol'ed about the Bob Saget part. He's a keeper for posting on your blog, my man would never in a million years. I hate distance. This past school year I was in a LDR and it sucked! Now I'm going to school 15 minutes from him but I'm completely sure I still wont' see him as much as I would like :(

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  12. I'm sure it would be awful for that long! Luckily we're only apart for two months, so that's not bad in comparison! And he is funny and a keeper! :)

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